Saturday, August 28, 2010

قرابين جديدة


الطريقة الوحيدة المتاحة أمامي لكي أعيش
هي الموت بشكل مستحدث
أن أقدم ذاتا قديمة قربانا لذات جديدة
يجب أن تولد
ستولد
أو ريما بإمكانها أن تولد
أن أتخلى عن وجود من أجل وجود
وذات من أجل ذات
أن أقدم قربانا لغدي
يومي هذا
أن أنتحر حتى أحيى
أن أبكي حتى تروي دموعي حاجة للحزن
"لم أعرف أبدا أن الدمع هو الإنسان
أن الإنسان بلا حزن ذكرى إنسان"
الموت
برغم كل الخيالات وبيوت العنكبوت التي تنسج من حوله
حياة
لا أحد يعود من الموت
لكننا جميعا نعود من الحزن
كلمات
أفكار
قد تمزقنا
وتقطع قلوبنا تقطيعا
فعل أقسى من أي فعل مادي تصنعه كل خناجر العالم
نقدم أرواحنا
حيانتا
ذواتنا
قرابين
لكن روحنا التي سافرت بعيدا تركت مكانها
لروح جديدة
وقلبنا عاد لينبض مجددا
نحن
برغم كل ما يمكن أن يسميه
العالم ألما
مستعدون لتقديم
قرابين جديدة

Thursday, August 26, 2010

I love three Souls



No need to think and rethink about how we have this time here. We do the three of us. Yeah, so true a very limited period of time but a very enjoyable one. Life is life just one. But me, myself and I have to live it for three. I don't question my relationship with me. Myself and me are very separate; I mean we are not technically the same person. We are one because people feel so satisfied when they play rational. Yet, we are not. OK, let's make it simpler, myself can talk about me and me can talk about myself so obviously they are not the same. Plus, 'I' is the third. I is responsible for acting and feeling. Anyway, the most beautiful things on earth don't need an explanation. Thanks to Einstein explanation made of time and space deprived me of sitting romanticlly watching the moon. Well, relativity is not always a fun way to think of the moon. Same for ourselves, it is a waste of time to try to understand who are these three and what they do.


I mentioned above; it is a very limited period of time so it is up to you to jump into water or to wait for a better weather. Me, Myself and I are alive, we love and breathe together. And in the end of the day we watch the same dreams.


So if I don't love these three I will become crazy. No one before has asked me do you want to be me or not. SO it is not my choice to be these three. I have to accept them otherwise I will commit suicide. But say I couldn't is there any other solution?


After thinking, struggling and spending years (I mean days) crying, I come up with the Secret (sure my secret I respect all copy writings:) I simply love me, myself and I so much. Be ready for the coming because I know everyone who is going to read this is going to call any psycho he knows:)


I usually picture myself hugging me, kissing me and telling me reassuring words like 'it is ok' and 'we will be fine'. I talk to me loudly (many do by the way). To make a long story short, I treat them (the three) as separate people. Once I was in a concert and I was very sad at the same time I was singing and smiling I am in a concert this what should happen. Suddenly, I looked at the stars and saw me out my body running and coming to me and did hug me. (Am crazy no better proof).


'I love you', this is an expression that you can hear from a parent, friend, partner oh this is the most common expression that I usually hear from me and myself. Crying, smiling, studying, watching TV, they say nothing else but I LOVE YOU! (Am the luckiest person on earth right??). Well, it should be, as researchers claim that 90% of what a person tells himself is negative.(Lucky me)


I don't think that 'I love you' and ' it is OK' are negative.


Was it that way all my life?


Sure no it wasn't. I used to be like anybody else telling myself that I am not good enough, or I need to do more or anything else. What I did was very simple: reprogramming myself. It took me about 2 years (Not too much time) In the beginning it was very hard. But today wow it happens subconsciously. My subconscious loves me isn't cool?!!


OK maybe you are wondering how to do it? well very simple : Every time you feel bad about yourself say that you love who you are! say I am beautiful !I am good !I am special! write it on your MSN status(My old trick; it is making all my friends crazy and few of them like me even more)


Well, fake it till you make it. One day you will wake up loving yourself you know why simply because you, yourself and you won't be happy if there is no love. You, yourself and you, deserve to be loved.


Monday, August 23, 2010

A Break from Life


When I decided to take a break from life, I meant literally to stop living; take the last seat and watch things happening. There were not special ideas of living, it was simply a break. And then I found myself living more. I meant not to love, not to compete or try but I ended up trying more, loving more and laughing more. Perhaps, I took off the pressure by deciding to break my routine. Well, I usually take a break from time to time I call it a retreat or a white week. Just some time I took to relax and empty my mind. But this recent break was the most enjoyable at all. I guess the reason was I was not supposed to do anything I was not even supposed to relax or clear my mind. I just started doing nothing.


I had a huge appetite to live, to do that and that and this. And Then it was like I turned the lights off, shut down the music; like I stopped all my senses, my feelings, my mind and I called it a break from life. I tried a similar idea on my last birthday, I literally did nothing, I spent all the day laying down thinking and enjoying.


I have enjoyed it . I am a believer that happiness is not about all what you can buy , acquire, posses or even experience. Happiness could be just siting down in your PJ with a good book while your heart beats : am the Queen of the world (my heart;).

Friday, August 20, 2010

You Versus Others...No Choice is Up to Them; To Be Happy Stop Asking Them and Start Asking You!


"The great majority of us are required to live a life of constant duplicity. Your health is bound to be affected if, day after day, you say the opposite of what you feel, if you grovel before what you dislike, and rejoice at what brings you nothing but misfortune". ~Boris Pasternak

Others are everything in ourlives. Like it or not; we put the most fashionable clothes on to see that acceptance and astonishment in their eyes. We try to become famous and make differences; why not to write a book or release a song or make some millions. A huge motivation behind anything different we do: to be noticed.

keep reading here:



Tuesday, August 3, 2010

My twenties


I am not sure what is the special thing about being on your twenties that urges everybody older or younger to tell you : oh you are on your twenties now enjoy to the max! but how am I supposed to enjoy?

Every time someone says so I wish I can keep being on my twenties forever, I couldn't figure out any other way to enjoy my twenties rather than keep them. Whatever I do, the time will come when I am not twenty any longer. What makes this number so special?


Why when people grow up and reach there 4os or 50s, they always remember their twenties with pain and regret. If twenties are that special why remembering them is not. I cannot see any special thing when it comes to numbers. Twenties are like 30s 40s, and 50s, just numbers.


No matter what I do some day I will be fifty or maybe 100 who knows? I won't keep being 23 forever and at the same time how could I enjoy my 23. Simply, also no matter what I do I won't feel I am doing all things I can. I guess what makes twenties so special is that you are not supposed to do things right, you have chance to commit mistakes, to TRY. I guess that is the most important thing, you have the chance to try.


On 55 you cannot try anymore, you are supposed to be protected by experience now you have to do the right thing! Ironic! When they grow up, people start to accept and stop trying. That is why ,they usually think of their twenties desperately. That was the only space of time possible to try. But who said so, anyone could try. Even if I have 158 I won't stop trying and do mistakes. What is the worst thing that could happen?


To try is simply to live. I once read a very interesting sentence 'life does not come with a manual'. So there are no specific things supposed to work or things supposed to do not. Life is choices and attempts. That way twenties wouldn't be special anymore. You can try regardless of your age. And it is never to late to try.


Monday, August 2, 2010

"She is nothing but a beautiful smile, a smile I thought I could not lose"


"She is nothing but a beautiful smile, a smile I thought I could not lose".

Wait for a moment when you cannot be nothing but yourself and tell me what you really feel about you. It is a rare moment not to mention it won't happen ever. A moment to put them out of you to not be anymore a reflection of what they are.Oh no you are dreaming! It is easy to tell what they think of you which ones love you and which ones don't. It is easy to tell how much people you have hurt and how much people you have really loved. But could you tell me when you have hurt you and when you haven't.

Choose your clothes, put that magic smile on your face and go out face them talk to them, look for them wait for appreciations, gratitude and love. Wait for a similar mind or a similar soul. You know what? You won't find anything of that, you are looking for them in the wrong places and things.

They judge you; they hate you, they hurt you, and suddenly you start to complain and tell me how much they did change you. Did they do? Or in somehow you let them do? Tell me when would you be just you? Could you take off your clothes? Could you stop thinking or prtending? Could you close your eyes for moments? Could you think of YOU, just YOU?

You know exactly how to get them, impress them and make them just think of you. Could you impress yourself? Could you love yourself? Do you love yourself?
Who are you? Just tell me What do you think of you?

I know, it is not easy to answer.

"She is nothing but a beautiful smile, a smile I thought I could not lose.

Coulrophobia



With his funny colored face, he could bring things together; divide them. No special reasons to suffer deeply inside and put a large smile on your face! Isn't so true that all if us do the same? We hide. Hide everything you know, everything you do, everything you love and everything you have lost. Hide how we feel and why we feel and we are not brave enough to face clowns so we develop coulrophobia.

Unspoken words tell the endless story of sadness and sufferance. Giving up yourself to make others happy; you put back to that Ocean inside any word that might hurt.

You bring to your fingers all colors that a human could recognize. You paint your face and cover who you are. Colors for fun and enjoyment. And then with white paint you draw the biggest smile on earth. One that your lips could not create. Your final touch remains the famous red noise as you tell the world :" No offense, but it is better not to smell you!"

Colors, colors, colors but you couldn't hide your tears and heart; your suffering soul that dances along.

Aren't we all clowns?