Saturday, October 16, 2010

Doing the wrong things can be fun too!

I always say that life doesn’t come with a manual. Right and wrong, good and bad do not make sense but socially. I believe that society is a meaningless invention. However, outside society 'being' has another meaning and technically society is not an invention. I will try to accept society the way it is; even though society doesn’t accept me the way I am and tries to define me the ‘ways’ that I have to be. Regardless of what society decides to be right or wrong, we all have our references and judge things according to them. That is fine (sure keep question your references). But like it or not, we need to belong. We need to have a strategy, a plan or whatever could be called. We need past, priorities, judgments; all of them help ‘life make sense’J

Nevertheless, most people usually do things that they judge ‘wrong’. In other words, they betray their references. People cheat on their diets, skip the daily workout, think when they are supposed to meditate, watch TV instead of doing homework… Does it look like misery? I bet everyone reading this sentence, will definitely perceive himself as a sinner and 'miserable human being' doing the wrong, bad, harmful, unacceptable things mentioned above. But dear 'miserable human being', making those mistakes is FINE. The earth won’t stop moving and your heart is still beating. Imperfect action is better than no action. We all learn from our mistakes. Thanks to failures and mistakes, I am who I am now, and you are who you are now (very lucky to visit my blog and read this articleJ)

I couldn’t stand for 2 seconds when I started meditating. But thanks to my mistakes, thanks to thinking first times, I am meditating now on a daily basis, and I am aware of the gift of a peaceful mind. I have seen Oprah today and the episode was about ‘Eat Pray Love’ a movie based on a true story (that I am crazily trying to watch, and before I watch it, it already is my best movieJ). I liked the scene when she was trying to meditate for 2 minutes and she couldn’t stop thinking. It happened to all of us first times. To make mistakes and grow gradually are definitely normal and I think they are fun.

Fun is what we are seeking. Yet, we ruin the joy of learning, of growing by blaming and complaining.

Here it is the inspiration of this article:

Location: a restaurant.

'Actors': a friend of mine and Arwa (I)

Purpose: drinking coffee, eating chocolate cakes.

My friend was doing two contradictory things; eating the chocolate cake and saying : “ oh look at me am eating sweets! oh I will gain weight! oh I put kilos in my body! Oh I have to stop eating sweets. “

My mind : “Arwa could we run away, this is insane!”

Well, I couldn’t understand how she consciously ordered the cake and how she was consciously cutting pieces and eating and how she was consciously blaming herself and deciding what could happen to that cake :turn into kilos. She had the choice to order something else, to only drink the coffee, to buy some vegetables. But, she did not. What I couldn’t be able to understand is the contradiction between choosing to do something and blaming yourself for doing it. For me I valuate responsibility. I am responsible for my choices; if I choose not to eat the cake to keep fit; I will enjoy my choice. I won’t blame and say oh I want to eat that and this and vise versa. By the way, I did extremely enjoy my cake. Really chocolate could make women happyJ George Bernard Shaw was right when he said “There is no love sincerer than the love of food”. Don’t want to complete the quote for a reasonJ

When people buy things and start complaining about the money they spent, I just wonder why they spent it first place. Why they eat unhealthy food, why they keep dating the wrong guy or girl and at the same time they complain, I just don’t get it. I believe that if I CHOOSE to keep doing something even if it is hurtful and not healthy, it is better for me to enjoy it. After all, calculations ruin the magic of life. And I am doing the wrong thing anyway, so doing it with a smile and a content heart is really better for myself.

I said imperfect action is better than no action. I don’t mean that we have to do mistakes in purpose or hurt oneslef. I mean that imperfection is perfection. Let’s discuss the example of food. An unhealthy meal once a week shocks your metabolism and lets you lose more weight. Another example, when you are working out, you build muscles you keep building muscles when you are resting. Therefore, the wrong things are not actually wrong. They are just assumptions, that we have learnt somewhere. People thought that earth is the center of the universe, believed in thinking big, and also advised to think small, people eat vegetables and live 100years in Asia and eat meat and live 100 years in Italy…what are the right things and what are the wrong things? It depends. I am 'Einsteinan', I admit it, everything is relative and nothing is true. You don’t know it, till you try it. And when you try it, you will make mistakes. And when you make mistakes, remember mistakes are fun.

We all know the famous story of Thomas Edison. If Edison kept saying every time he ‘failed’, I am dreaming, I cannot make this happen, I am losing my time, we won’t have this light bulb; without which, I wouldn’t be able to write this article at night. So try to make mistakes as much as you can.

What do you first do when you learn to swim? You make mistakes, do you not? And what happens? You make other mistakes, and when you have made all the mistakes you possibly can without drowning - and some of them many times over - what do you find? That you can swim? Well - life is just the same as learning to swim! Do not be afraid of making mistakes, for there is no other way of learning how to live!” Alfred Adler

PS: Mistakes are fun!