When I was informed about my trip
to Berlin, I was overwhelmed, I did not think about how valuable the training
is or how much the trip would be, I was thinking about the hours I need to
teach and the schedule that I need to follow in order to be ready by March the
second. And I was ready everything I prepared was useful, however that being overwhelmed
and getting more stressed out by doing unstoppable stuff during 2 weeks in
order to be able to travel, were alarming signs: this is not who I am! I don't
think this way! I am positive! and I find always a way to enjoy my time! so
what is happening to me?
Well, yeah, I feel
upset, lazy and that my life and my job have no meaning, I have been trying to
watch movies, read books, drink coffees and hang out with friends, nothing of
that did work. And then here I am in Berlin, a beautiful city but I don't feel
present I feel that my soul is absent, this is way I chose to fight this is not
a simple work trip .. this is a fight a trip for salvation a trip that would
get me back a trip that would save me and free my soul from stress, calculation
and conditional life that I have gave up too few months ago. Things have to
change, they are changing very slowly and I still feel that I brought up my
prison with me but I know that every day would be a good opportunity to destroy
a piece of that wall of stress and useless stuff that I have been surrounding
myself with like they destroyed the Berlin wall!
By the 30 of
March, my wall should be destroyed and my soul should be freed and the beauty
of this city should be seen. That is a challenge, a challenge to keep!
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